Rainbow Twin Flames, Kundalini Love, being given new eyes, a new view of Love

January 7, 2016 - Leave a Response

I am on this amazing journey with my Twin Flame.

The Kundalini purifies us so that we can travel to higher levels of existence.  Before the Kundalini purifies us we are impure vessels and can only see with limited vision.

With the Kundalini the more it burns through you the more it purifies you.  For me, when it got to the heart chakra and I discovered this love without expectation, this love that does not mold or bend another to our will, but accepts our place, each inside our journey, accepts that we are divinely lead to travel to the place where we can accomplish what we came to do even if it means being apart from each other.  When I arrived there, at the Well of Love without Conditions I felt like I had been given new eyes with which to view the world.

It was not that I felt like I had to look at the whole of the Earth this way, just my Rainbow Twin Flame.  Before the purification of the Heart Chakra I was possessive.. and impatient.. thinking if he was indeed my Twin Flame (since he was the only one who showed up once I arrived at the Flame of the Twin Flames Fire)  I was thinking he should recognize me and I him, and we should live happily ever after already.  But instead we kept bouncing off each other, and there was no real way to know if he was actually my Twin Rainbow Flame, just because he was the only one holding me while I was delirious with this Kundalini desire.

He and he alone was the place where the purification happened within my heart, the place that made it all right for him to just be him (even though I share a lot of this journey I don’t share everything)  It was just that, even though he was gone from my presence when the Heart Chakra was purified, after that I felt as though I had been given new eyes through which to view our journey..

My Love is a Lion.. but when he was gone (as he had something pressing he had to do)  I had gone back to the Cougar (who those who have read most of this journey know about already) and began journeying with him.  It was while I was with the Cougar that I learned, in the next  part of my purification process that even though my Twin Rainbow Flames had left and had a journey he had to take, and his mission was in another country, and my mission was here, so that even though it appeared in our current life would we not be missioning together..  what I discovered was it did not matter.  What mattered was that we learn the lessons in the place where we are standing.

And with this I let go of my Rainbow Twin Flame.  I let go of everything, all the visions of a life time I had held onto, the belief that one day him and I would share a life in this current life.  I let go of the vision of the Rainbow Twin Flames.  I let go of the vision I seen that day when I was coming out Walmarts of the 2 Eagles dancing across the sky as they rose above an approaching storm.

I surrendered and let go of it all, and came into the lesson that the lessons are in the place where we are standing.  and my lesson was with a Cougar who had been part of my journey for 10 years who I could never quite give my love to.  So I decided I would give him my love and learn the lesson in the place where I was standing.

I am a galaxy spinning across the universe.  It is a lot for me to turn my energy from one direction, (from the girl of 12 who saw her one true love in a vision and headed for it) to the place where she was going to learn the lesson of love with another man, who she knew was not the one she saw when she was 12, but had discovered that the lessons were in the place where we were standing.  So I let go of everything and began heading towards the Cougar Spirited Man.

In letting go it seemed like I changed the Fates… and the next thing I know the Cougar is pushing me away.  It was like he picked up a foot and just propelled me in a  somewhat different direction..  and I felt like, Me, a Galaxy having to gather her skirt to see where she ended up..

And it was while I was there that I looked around and saw my Rainbow Twin Flame dressed as a woman and I became curious to see him up there dressed as a woman..  so I think, “Well I will just watch him now as he dances in his feminine through my sky.”

Now I am a girl of vision and when the little blue butterfly dances at my feet I must go to my Twin Rainbow Flame and tell him hello, and this is where I am on my journey.. so I did..

And he responded by coming into the space where I sing and dancing with me..  as a she .. so I danced back ..

My love is a LION, and the next thing I know he comes in there and he ROARS..  And for the first time I did not run away but followed him out of the room into a place where our love began to mate..

Then in the beauty that follow, my guardian Bear came and told me that my love had walked with me for the whole of this whole life, that he was all over the dreams I had been writing out for all these years…

And the next thing I know I have come into the presence of his Divine Feminine who had also been inside my dreams..

And again I was given new eyes with which to view a deeper love..

Holy of Holies 3



22 ~Dreams of morphing into our light bodies with you

December 29, 2015 - Leave a Response


Then Great Bear told me that inside the books of old that I had written over the years were all the dreams I dreamed of you, or at least the ones I brought out of the dream time with me.  He said it was time to revisit “the Books” and look for him inside the dreams you have already dreamed, for you have already dreamed him through time.

Here is a dream from 2003..  He says the guy in the dream was you, only I couldn’t remember you at the time..

When I woke up inside the dream I had just come to the river that I knew I was supposed to cross because of the stepping stone that appeared before me in the water.  I hopped onto the stepping stone and looking around I saw another stepping stone rising up out of the water so I stepped onto it also and waited.

Moments later another stepping stone appeared so I hopped over to it and waited..

I hopped from stone to stone, each one rising up in the moment I would be ready until at last I was halfway across.  In front of me stood a huge column that had a very small ledge around it.  There was a guy there and he was standing on the ledge with his arms hugging the column.

By faith I had jumped from stepping stone to stepping stone and now it seemed the call was to hop onto the ledge of this column that seemed to travel down into the water, and up into the clouds.

Right after I jumped onto the ledge of the column a storm came in, a tempest wind blowing all around us.  Water was splashing up all around us as the sky grew dark and gray.  I looked around for the next stepping stone but it did not just appear.

The guy he is looking around too, then he just lets go of the column and steps back into the water where he just sinks down into the water.  So I do the same thing.  I let go and slip into the water.

We slip down to the bottom and swim into a room with a glass window.  The furniture is unique with those curved legs with the balled feet.  The guy goes through another doorway into an inner chamber, but I stay in the room to look at the furniture for a moment before following him.

In a bit we come back to the room with the furniture.  Then the Earth begins to quake.  The furniture opens its eyes wide, looks around, pick up their legs and run for cover.  As the water outside the room is being tossed around the window suddenly breaks and a woman is swept in.  Then she morphs into her light body, becomes a beam of light and disappears into it..  Then, as the Earth is still quaking, the man morphs into his light body and disappears into the beam of light..  Then it happens to me also, as the furniture has all backed away and is watching from a distance, I morph into my light body and disappeared into the beam of light..

Sacred Bear tells me this was us, dreaming our future.. that the guy in the dream was you and I dreaming together

110115 a mermaid tale first he spirial me times before the mermaid picture adjusted

21 ~Into me

December 28, 2015 - Leave a Response

Every day at work I have to have this meditation moment.  The people that work around me, for the most part are highly negative, preferring to complain about any and everything rather than accepting the path they are walking or getting off of it.  It can be over whelming to be excited over the little blessings that life offers while listening to the people around me complain..  So I started going into the quiet room at work, turning off all the lights, laying down and then I follow my breath to the moment before sleep when the mind enters the magic of the twilight hour..

As soon as I feel that shift my mind becomes clear again, then I get back up because right after that I would fall asleep..

So last Thursday was really rough on the people around me.  They had no gratitude for our 3 day weekend and blatantly loud and mostly hateful. It was even worse than usual so I went to lunch, then laid down to do my cleansing ritual,  Took my mind down to the place where all thoughts leave and it is clear, when I thought to look around and ask, “Love are you here?  Cause you know I like to keep you close to me.”

Just like that your astral body was beside me on the floor.  You looked at my face for a moment, then you laid down beside me, stuck your astral arm into my body and held my hand..

In that moment when you stuck your astral arm inside of me, my body lit up, all around where your arm was and in your arm, there was a beautiful glow and dance of lights.  I was so surprised that I just looked at  you and asked you if you could see that…  and you just smiled… and glowed.. and continued to hold my hand..

into me use




Year in review, a Dancing Bird Goddess Fairy Tale Twin Flame journey

December 26, 2015 - 2 Responses

As I work on my year in review it has been an unbelievable year of journeying.  I thought I was headed in one direction, away from all that I believed could be true.  I spent the year letting go of everything, every part of me who had built this hope on the man of my dreams that I saw when I was 12 and saw that at some point our missions were supposed to join

When you are a person who walks out of sync with Time it is a very hard journey.  It is like walking in 2 worlds at once, one with each foot in a different world and each world feels so completely different than the other that the space between is dark and without hope. It is like a living hell, and yet you know that by walking in these 2 worlds at once you are supposed to be the bridge that mends the crack and brings them back together before you are through.

You look out into the one world and there is no hope.  All the people you meet are lost and without hope.  They are a people who are lead by fear to do awful things to each other, doing all they can to exterminate the indigenous Tribes who are the natural born protectors of the planet, doing all that they can to exterminate each other.  They are lead by fear and everywhere you look there is chaos, that is being feed by prejudice against all that is different.

You look into the other world and alls you can do is grab and hold tightly to the glimmers of hope that are revealed..  being lead by a beautiful Indian woman whose instructions were that in all ways I should merge with the Earth and follow the rules that were written upon the Earths body.   Then a second glimmer of hope appeared in a glimpse through time of a man I knew to be my one and only love.  He was showing me the contract he was signing to, come to Earth on a mission, showing me that place where our missions were going to touch.

So I did as I was instructed.  I remained diligent in merging with the Earth and held onto the glimmer of hope that this man, whose presence made my heart sparkle and dance and I were going to reconnect one day and walk together in our mission.

We did not meet in the physical until 2011.  He could remember that he was looking for me but he could not remember that I was the one he was looking for..  And I could not remember him as we sat together that day trying to find our Twin Flames.  The Earth gave me this picture that one day this man would hold my hand in the stars and she bound me to him by having me to cut off my braid and toss it into his dark waters as he was currently walking through the Dark Night of the Soul.  She bound me to him and made me to be his medicine.  And every time she needed me to be the light upon his path she would have the mark left in my hair from cutting off the braid, it would act out and have a mind of its own.

In the meantime she had me on this Kundalini journey telling me she needed me to get lit, that she needed me to head towards my Light Body.  Kundalini is a journey of purification.  It can be very intense having all darkness, all impure ways of believing burned out of you.  It is like being at the black hole at the center of a galaxy watching parts of your belief system, you way of being being sucked into the black hole, to be transformed into something new.  It is very intense.

In the years before 2015 my Twin Flame and I had reconnected, had touched our love again, and just as we began to dance he got word that there was something he had to go do.  We dreamed it together, and even though it tortured him he disappeared into that which he had to go do…

And I was left alone on my Kundalini journey, weeping as the Kundalini was about to burn through my Heart Chakra (for those who have followed my Kundalini journey probably remember)

After that I found myself on a different path, the one that lead to 2015 which was the year of letting go.  I had briefly retouched my Twin Flame after that but again I just bounced off of him and back into another place where I seemed to be learning another lesson.  This lesson of 2015 was about the total and complete letting go of him, letting go of the glimmer of hope I had been holding onto since I was 12 years old that the one who made me sparkle and dance was destined to make me sparkle and dance here on planet Earth.

In  reality we lived on separate continents and each of us had a mission to do that each of us was bound to fulfill.  My mission was to the Lakota Nation, to uplift their prayer, “We shall live again”  .. and his mission to the planet Earth was on the continent he was living on, and honoring that mission was very important to him.  So I had to take a long hard look on it could be that we could both be on the same planet at the same time and not get to be together as lover and friend..

I looked through time and saw there was no time, that time was just an illusion we wore to keep our focus within the realm of a 3 dimensional world where we did our work.  The reality was him and I had loved each other since we were created in the great womb of the great Mother/Father.  There was never a moment that I did not love him, nor a moment that he did not love me.  We had gone on multiple missions together in which we shared the same space, created beautiful stories that were passed from generation to generation.  And we had gone on missions that required that we part, like the one I had gone on 13 generations ago to merge the seer bloodline with the warrior bloodline so that I could incarnate into this time.

Time was just the illusion we had created so that we could experience more with each other, but many got lost in the illusion and believed that this was all there was, so we who did not get caught in the illusion were always accepting missions to go in and build the bridges needed to bring the ones who had gotten lost back.

And in that sense I came to realize that the lesson is in where a person is at in their current moment.  It does not matter where it is at or who it is with.  The lesson is where you are at in the moment you are in.

So I let go.  I let go of any hope that he and I were meant to dance together in sacred union in this life.  I let go to let him be him.  I let go to embrace the life I was in, and the lesson was learning.  And after I completely and totally let go of any glimmer of hope, in the Eagle, in the visions and dreams of him.  All of it.  I let go of it and turned to the learning of the lesson I was in in the moment..  That was the journey of 2015… Letting go..

Then I let go of the lesson of 2015 and that journey came to an end.  It left me free and clear.. unbound ..

Unbound, on day I looked, and there dancing at my feet a little blue butterfly who told me it was time to softly check in with my Twin Flame..  So I jotted him a little note…  and the rest of the story is sheer magic..

In the year 1984, a troupe of Artist had appeared, minstrels and singers strumming their guitars softly.. others playing rock and roll..  Everyone sat around, a little high, it might be said, but all were sacred guest and many got out their pencils and begin to draw so I thought I would join in.


Years earlier I had tried to draw a picture of Isis, and for some reason, that I could not understand I had dressed her with an Eagle on her head.  I could not get the Eagle to come our right so as I sat contemplating what I should draw, I went to the library and got some books with Eagle pictures.  Found one I like and sat down to draw.


by the time I was almost done I realized that I had just draw a Ceremonial Headdress..  So it was time to put her body underneath her head dress..  and as I drew her I heard the words:

And at the end of the story


the Dancing Bird Goddess
stretches out her
wings and begins her
mating song.
She soars high above
the clouds,
aware that the
whose eye she has
caught is close
behind her, but she
is oblivious to 
anything else.

This is her dance. 
This is her song,
the battle she
fought to take
this leap of faith,
the love and laughter
of the lesson, 
the sorrow of so 
long walking alone, 
of never feeling mated,
the innocence of the
search, lost once,
but regained when
she played with the
boys, the dance
that pleased them,
and caught their
attention.  The
connection for the
pleasure that came
with them,
always raising her
head towards the
heavens, divine kiss
from above.

This and more
she sang as she 
danced her mating
song, ever aware
of the 
who so awed her
with his 
gentleness and
his grace
that she made a
come to life
and fly up there
to meet him.


She rolls over 
onto her back and
reaches out 
with her talons
to greet him.
His talons
lock onto hers.
She embraces him
and with
wings spread wide
they tumble towards
the Earth in the
most glorious free-
fall.  And
every time she 
tumbled over onto
her back,
with him on top,
she experienced
inside her body
which made her
dance over
him again.


(((((((  Guess what? )))))))


20 ~Dancing on a Winters Solstice, Twin Flame memories revisited

December 21, 2015 - Leave a Response
Newgrange picture by Jane Tripp

Newgrange picture by Jane Tripp

I have been journeying with the winter solstice..  And you.   On our Home world..   Remembering the day our contracts to come to Earth were accepted..  And the way you appeared on a beam of sunlight that traveled all the way to the back of the cave where I had been sitting there waiting for you to show up.  Feels just like the Newgrange Winter Solstice..

I could find you in many places, in the way you held me all day long, one arm on each side as we danced in sacred dance, sunrise and sunset..

In could find you in sparkles of your light upon my waters..

and beams of sunlight through the clouds.

in the dance of the leaves through the trees

the warmth of your heat baking me on my summer grounds..

Everywhere around me I could feel you,

Time and time again..

but there were also places where I would go

and wait for you to show.

I adore also dwelling in the secret places with you..

in the places that also marked your movement across my skin..

that said now you will begin moving closer again

Sunlight again coming my way,

making all the babies want to come out and play

Sitting there that day

when I was 12

waiting for your you to come in on your beam of light..

Then first the Elder Council came

the light at the front of the cave

and gave to me the good news

that the Council had accepted

the contract I wrote for my mission to the Earth..

Then there you were,

your dancing shimmering light

making its way to the back of the cave

My heart rejoicing as I slipped back to you

where you held me and did that dance

the way you do..

And showed me the contract that you wrote

to meet me in this place where we have come

to celebrate

Sunlight again coming my way,

making all the babies that want to come out and play

A Winters Solstice day

marking the beginning of another new dance.

I asked you once, "And what symbols would find their way to stand with my Twin Flame.. I understand.. Sweet Love

I asked you once, “And what symbols would find their way to stand with my Twin Flame as.. I understand.. Sweet Love


All this life I am inside this mission, it is always about learning, and the recovery of ancient memories in the place where one belief system has inserted itself over the top of a peoples walk of beauty even though it is not their walk of beauty.  To get from point A to point B takes a great honoring of the all the visions that are given.  (In the winter of my 59th year I have finally come to understand what the Winter Solstice is, and what it meant when I was 12 and you rode in on the beam of light to show me that your contract to Earth had been accepted also)

There was another happening that points to this moment in time when I regain this memory.  It was back in 2008.  It was on a Winters day that all of a sudden my body, in the place of lower tummy began to dance and tingle, like a girl in love.  And even though for all outside appearances I walked alone my lower tummy went into this feeling of incredible dance.  A dance so beautiful that I turned to the Earth and asked her what the meaning of this?

And she began to tell me how I was a Creation Singer, that I sang New Worlds into being with my song.  She said that she was my Orchestrate, that it was she who would tell me where to go stand in the underworld and sing my song to the sleeping ones, and from her commands I would turn and sing to the sleeping ones..

And as I watched the seeds within the Earth, and bulbs and tubes would hear my song and stir again with life..  And that the reason my tummy was now dancing was because I was doing as I had been told by her to do, and was now singing a new world into being…

And there stood you, when I was 12, your light beaming, traveling down that shaft, awakening within me the memory that it was time again to sing a new world into being..

Newgrange Ireland pictures found on line.

Newgrange Ireland pictures found on line.


18 ~a glimpse into how Twin Flame Love works, secrets of the Bear on the bottom of my Totem Pole

December 14, 2015 - Leave a Response

Spirit sleeping together, bodies on separate continents, it is a different kind of love..

Oh My Sweet Love, it was just so pretty last night..  I went to bed and then I couldn’t sleep…  So I rolled over unto my back and I still couldn’t sleep..  So I was thinking, “Well I should get back up then,” and when I turned to get up, your arm tightened around me so I scooted over closer to you  and then you started at my head and with a soft sweep you erased every piece of energy that was keeping me awake from my head to my feet and within 3 minutes I was an empty slate for you to hold so softly..  I just rolled over spooned into you and softly fell asleep inside your heart…  And woke up this morning still there in that soft space..  It feels like a part of you stays holding me until I get up even though you have been up for hours…    XXXOOXXX

I so adore you..  Bear and you came to me in a dream recently and showed me  how from our home world you would come to me every night in my dream time and take me with you back to our home world where we would continue with our love story..  And then every morning you would bring me back home and you and the Great Bear would erase my memories of the dreams.  It felt just like that last night when you put me to sleep so you could keep holding me.

Signatured Love

I would like to paint your face with my lightning in a dream with you and then bring the picture out with me.     I am so into you,  as I merge my Isis love with my beautiful Shining Star. Every thing I gave you in that moment you have given back to me…  Coming to pick me up every night for this life to ensure I made it to my destiny..  Even when I was a child and could not remember you…  Then dropping into that body like you did in this life when I had already walked across the for so long..  And and in our final dream you did that zig zag back and off to the side, then disappeared into another dimension, where you dropped into a human body whose life was pure hell,  thinking “I have to find her again”…  In a place as black as night, honoring the story of the man who let you take his place and searching every where for the love you knew was yours..  The girl who walked with the Lion, our signature through time…

Kundalini snake on my arm..  Our signature through time..

The girl who could not stop singing a love song that called to your heart in the midst of the chaos.  Our signature through time.

Our love carries a signature through time

As a child I did have a hard time remembering my dreams.  There was only one that stayed with me.  It was when I learning to ride a bike.  I simply could not figure out how to ride a bike, embarrassingly so because everyone else in the family learned to ride a bike before me.  Then one night I went to bed and dreamed I was riding a bike.  There was someone back behind me, holding the bike up.  I thought it was my dad, but when I turned to look I saw it was a woman (who I have seen you draw a picture of her too, and she is the one from my Woman who grew Wings dream)  She was gliding effortlessly beside me, holding the bike up while her feet were not moving.  Then she leans in and whispers in my ear, “The balance of the bike is in the front wheel.”  She turns the handle one way and I start to fall over, then turns the handle to the other side and I start to fall the other way.. then turning the handle to the center, I find the balance of the bike, and magically I can ride it..

Years later, when the Great Eagle appeared in a vision from my quest to know if the Great Father existed, when the answer came in the first thing I ask for was to find her again.  Then waking up and finding me coming out of the library with an armload of books, I began the journey of dream exercises to find the her.. all the while unknowing that in finding her, I was finding you…

My dreams became so magical..  an attic which had a room in which everything in it was magical and would activate as I walked past it.. there was a magic mirror there and when I would see it out of the corner of my eye I would see you and me.  But when I would try to look at it to see you, it would become a mirror and all I could see was myself.

One time a storm blew in (inside my dream) and through the clouds I could see a man in a hot air balloon coming towards me.  As he came into some intense lightning he changed vehicles and took on the form of a hand glider weaving his way back and forth through the lightning.  and when it came time for him to land he changed forms again..  4 horses and their riders. As they crested the hill the first one took on form of a Wizard and the other 3 his young Raccoon’s.

He came to me with something that looked like a prayer stick and bid me smoke it with him.  when I did, I lost all consciousness, til I came back.  Then he offered me another hit.

In another dream after that I was staring to the north and to the east I saw a Ferris Wheel off in the distance…

In another magical dream, my son came to me and said,  “Mom there are Angels asleep in the bed.”  I went and looked and sure enough, a man and woman, Angels, asleep in the top bunk of the bed.  He was cradled against her like you were cradled against me this morning, (even though we live in different countries.)   I don’t know why but I sang to them in their sleep…  and now I believe they were showing me us, and I thought that at the time, but until you came into my life here on Earth this time, I could barely remember what us felt like..

One of the predominant things about doing the dream exercises to become conscious in my dreams was the fact that I found myself traveling to the same place over and over.

1024px-Philae,_seen_from_the_water,_Aswan,_Egypt,_Oct_2004One was to a life in Egypt.  I would push against the dream to  try to see further.  In the beginning I kept finding myself at the end of a large building.  We were going down to the waters edge to bathe and teach the children.  When it came to my graduation time they shaved off the front of my hair and tattooed a golden sun onto my forehead.  In my current life I am a Taurus.

There was also a snake (Kundalini) that would travel with me.  It would bounce along beside me, like a friend, and then one day it bounced up and wrapped itself around my arm.

Another dream series I found myself in was a place I repeatedly traveled to.  At the time I didn’t know why.  I would make it to the small town with the 2 stop lights, (the 2 moons) and traveling through I would get to the forest but would not be able to bring out the rest of the dream.  Since you are here now I have discovered that this is a Nebula, a place where Stars are born.

In 1993 I was instructed that to find you in this life I would have to get onto an Indian path.  At the time I did not know I was a Native American.  I only knew that my grandparents were.  The only way I could think to do it was to begin writing you letters every day to speak to you.  This had the effect of allowing me to become aware of you in my dreams.  Most of the time I would refer to you as the man who walks with me through my dreams.  But still I was blind without seeing the deeper meaning of your touch within my story.

11 years later, 2004, I was instructed that the prayer had gone forth.  No more was I to write you, that now it was up to Creator to lead me to where I was to go to answer my prayer to find you again.  It was really hard to stop writing you as every day I would sit at my computer and desperately want to let the song flow again. .  and while I sat there a beautiful thing happened to me for I merged with a bolt of lightning and he shared his song with me.  I became transformed and was sent to be walking towards my purification story.  I was taught much along the way with the Great Mother leading my path down a road to a Kundalini story.  Many people run away from the Kundalini story for it is very intense having all that is impure within the story line removed in the giant storm that ensue..  But the Earth, she just told me to hold on because she needed me to travel through the great storm..

To my great comfort I was given a man who was lost also inside the storm and looking for his Twin Flame.  And for some strange reason he allowed me to sing to him my love song, as he was the Angel who was carrying me through the storm.

Then low and behold, I came into his heart and he into mine.  We joined as One and found we are each others Twin Flames..  From 2004 until we truly knew this, 11 of my human years had passed.. and 11:11 event..

Our love carries a signature through time… It is how we find each other again and again..

And since I discovered this, the Bear has revealed, through a dream, that even after we accepted our missions to go to the planet called Earth, and I left before you, that you travel nightly into my dreams where we would travel together, to the same places again and again….  and every morning, when you brought me back you would erase the memory of us being together from my mind.. until our love in human form was remembered..

Our love through time carries a signature.  There are many Twin Flames who have arrived at this same mission for the Earth, for him for her, for the Two who Walk as One…..  It makes me wonder, in the next great circle.. what name will they call us.. the gods and goddesses of our time have congregated once again to sing a new world into being..  m human self is learning so much as we remember who we are….

(PS I love your Totem Pole picture..  It is a perfect reflection, with the Bear on the bottom and her love up above the Bear…  (((((( hugs ))))))

17 ~Eagles Love song within a Kundalini Twin Flame Dance

December 6, 2015 - Leave a Response

1984I am a girl who watches for the signs.  Hop skipping from age 12 to 35 found me viciously being torn apart by my second husband as he was divorcing me.  I was arm candy to him and had displeased him by not obeying the “norm” and for some reason he was divorcing me by smearing my good name to my family and friends.  I was in pain as I was deciding I would never let another man break my heart again..

The next thing I know I am being approached by a friend who said she saw my one true love in a vision.  She said he was an Indian with long black hair and he stepped out of the forest, came to me and offered me his peace pipe.  She said he will show you a love like none you have ever known.

A month later I was approached by another friend who told me that she had a dream that she was at some kind of gathering when she saw a beautiful Indian Man step out of the forest.  She said that she immediately thought of me and went over to him to tell him about me.  She said he said that I was not looking for him that I was looking for power.

It was a path changing moment because I am a girl who looks for signs on how to get from point A to point B and what this told me was that I needed to get on an Indian path to find you.  I did not even know I was an Indian at this time.  I only knew that I was being guided by an Indian Woman to get my answers from the Earth.

journal1993thru2000unburnedTo help me change paths I wrote you a book.  I called it The Prayer (the one I sent to you 3 years ago, or so).  The second thing I did was to begin writing letters to you.  I called you Indian Spirit Man and wrote you nearly every day for years to tell you where I was on my journey to find you and to draw closer to me.  On each notebook I filled up I would put a picture.

The Eagle was important to me.  A bunch of artist showed up at the house so I sat down to draw with them and an amazing thing happened.  While drawing the  Eagle I suddenly realized it was a headdress and as I drew her beneath it I saw the words, “And at the end of the story the Dancing Bird Goddess soars high above the clouds, ever aware that the Great Eagle, whose eye she has caught is following behind her but unaware of anything else..  In that moment I am made aware that everything that happens next is part of the journey and can be translated into symbols within the book I am writing for him. (which I named, Journey to the Edge of the Precipice)

Later I made a picture of a cloud and painted on it, “Come find me” and added mated Eagles to the wall.  After a time2005 february you showed up in my dreams.  I called you the Indian who Walks with Me through my Dreams, and other times I called you the Man who Walks with me through my Dreams.   (Now I know they are the North of the River Dream Series)

The Earth began attempting to guide me.  She would tell me to take an exit and I would tell her I did not want to.  Finally I just asked her why she was doing that.  She said she wanted to see if I could follow instructions.

At the time I had a boyfriend.  (you did not show up in my dreams when I was with him, and I would write in my journal to you an apology for leaving the journey towards you while I was with him)  He was a junkie, a shoot em up junkie.  I did not know this until he told me that this was the reason for his bizarre behavior.  So I took him back because he said he was going to get clean.

The need of a junkie is like a woman you cannot resist, her call upon his heart so strong that he went back to her and the bizarre behavior began again.  It was finally when I heard the cops repeating again, “ma’am we believe this man is going to kill you if you don’t get a restraining order against him” that I heard them, for he had already taken a knife to my throat and done other things that could have killed me.  I was broken by the experience and could hardly speak because I could not travel down the passage of my mind and find the words I was looking to find as so many times his behavior would be so bizarre that I would hide in the closet in fear until he would leave.

So I did as they said and 3 months later began to write you again daily.  I thought a lot about my journey, about how my life just kept getting worse and worse and had torn me to threads as I was trying to get my voice back, trying to find the passageway back to words behind doorways that would not open for me anymore.  I thought about how the Earth had tried to instruct me, how when I asked her why she had said, “I am checking to see if you can follow instructions,” and made the decision to surrender to her to do exactly what she said and be taken to my destiny (In the year 2000.)

Immediately feathers began being gifted to me.  The first ones were gold.  I was immediately taken into an Indian journey where I suddenly understood that I was an Indian.

4 years into the Indian journey I was told the prayer had been sent and it was time to let go and follow the path to my destiny, that I was not allowed to write you any more letters..  (a beautiful vision then unfolded and I was sent on a mission by the Earth.  I followed every command, even when I did not want to give my sacredness to some in the crowd, she told me,  “I know the waters look dark, but there are pearls in those waters.”  So I did exactly as she said.

9 years into my surrender to the Earth such devastation came upon my life that I wept for a month straight and cried out to you with all of my might to please come find me..

10 months later I was standing with a Lakota Indian when a storm came upon the group of us.  He turned, raised his hands and began singing a song to the approaching Thunder Beings..  and my heart chakra (which had closed when I had decreed that no man would ever break my heart again)  my heart chakra opened wide and all this love began to pour out of.  There were signs there that told me he was not the One, for I had gone there to meet him and his bride to be.

Then on the eve of Thanksgiving I was driving home from work when I saw a Rainbow Flame flash before me,  then a second one, signalling a Rainbow Twin Flame journey was about to begin, and moments later I came over the hill to see a million dollar fireworks display being sent off…  Everything after that became a vision as I was then taken to the place where I found my way Home and was taken into the purification chamber where my base chakra was activated.

In the 11 year after I surrendered to the Earth I met you, a girl with her kundalini spinning wildly, deep in vision lion protector and the kindalini doorwayabout these Rainbow Twin Flames and fireworks that were coming when you came and sat beside me there.  Then there flashes before my eyes a picture, in the future of  us in the stars and you holding my hand.  And the next thing I know the Earth is screaming at me, “cut off your braid and send it to him now!!!!!”  So I did as I was told, and as you well know the rest is the history of an amazing kundalini journey, one in which the Earth guided through the mark that was left where the braid once laid, how I bounced to and away and to and away, all the while writing you a book I called, My Life as a Fairy Tale which called to your heart.. and your sister, she then came in the form of a butterfly blue to make certain I stayed on to a path to you..

The last time we parted took me to a new place, a place where I understood that you were on a mission in another 2EaglesWalmart110611_2country, and I was on a mission here, and in this life it simply was not our destiny to have a physical relationship, and that it was ok for me let you go in this life totally and completely because if the truth be known it did not matter what we did, or do because in the place where you are is the place where there is the lesson..  so I let go ..  of all hope of you holding for me that place in your heart where thought of us as a couple.  I surrendered.. and I let go of the picture the Earth had showed me of us in the stars and you holding my hand…  and surrendered to the free fall of the Eagle…

and as I am looking down I little blue butterfly is dancing around my feet…  And I thought, “Why are you showing up now?  I have just let go of him..

But being a girl who looks at the signs and believes they are important, I took a moment to jot you a line to let you know I had figured it all out… and you said you wished I would explain it to you…

Then like the Great Eagle in my Dancing Bird Goddess vision you grabbed my talons and listened to my love song as we plummeted down…

You make such a beautiful love story…

Our Kundalini rapture… our Transcend Dance…

The discovery that all my North of the River dreams were always the place I went to be with you..

To trying to see farther into our other world where we are together always..

I closed my eyes the other nights and suddenly I was laid up all against you..  I had my heart against your heart, my kundalini heart galaxy was spinning..  then I watched as your begin to spin and the 2 of our galaxies began to dance.  This had an amazing affect on you as I watched it shoot down your tummy, to your root chakra, and feel it begin to spin.  Then the energy slipped into my root chakra, and traveling up it past my tummy, into my heart chakra that was spinning..  Into your love I flow…  and you into mine..blissfulcircuit

(something like this picture only chest to chest.. it felt lovely)





16 ~Birth of the Blue Star from the North of the River Dream series

November 29, 2015 - Leave a Response

We are Stardust

I have consciously been trying to see further.  In our astral travels for a while now I could only see us flying, but could not see where we were..  Then I had the realization that the North of the River dream series were always about and with you and I began to see farther especially after you gave me the address.  It helped me to look at the journey differently.

Woke up one morning and it was being explained to me about about the countless times I made the journey North of the Rive and how upon awakening the memories would wiped from my consciousness.

The other day I found myself in a place where the waking state overlapped the dream state.  I closed my eyes to see where we were (as all of our lives are happening simultaneously) and found myself staring at a golden sun that was made up of lines (I could not do it justice drawing it, but some hours later I went to bed and as I was staring into the darkness I saw a blond headed woman in a golden chiffon dress that was blowing like the dance of a solar flare..

So imagine I am riding on the back of your Harley and we are gliding so smoothly down the road when I see a Golden Sun Woman to my left.. then we go around a curve and I see her again on my right..  I saw her 2 times, the Golden Sun Woman.

Then we come to a place I have been to very many times in my dreams.  As we are coming into town a single moon stands out in front of us signaling like a stop light at a corner.  It is a blood red moon  We are gliding smoothly on your Harley, when a slight bend in the road and and suddenly the moon splits out into 2 blood red moons.  Then after we pass them I look back and they are 2 yellow full moons.  A slight curve in the road and they bend back into one moon showing… like a stop light at the edge of town..

We move on, just like I always did in all the dreams as I have been here countless times and keep coming back, through the small town back out into the forest, into the windy road…  to my left I can see Golden Sun Woman, her light upon 2 clouds give them the appearance of light yellow golden Angel Wings..  and off in the distance behind that forms the body to the Angel.  It is pale turquoise in color…  to my right, up in the sky are 6 or 7 missiles.  I am beginning to think they were pillars of creation..  One of them appeared to have broken loose from the formation, made it kind of look like a YIIIII

I always loved the next part of the journey, traveling into the forest.  Watching the shadow of the trees contrasting with the light above.  An event happens up over us, through the clouds I can see something that reminds me of the Star Dancer from a vision some years ago.  She had braids in her hair that created the effect of a globe, a map of the stars.  As I am looking at this Event I am realizing it looks like an Atom.

Then we went past the observatory, and down the incline.  There was a place there you wanted to take me to, kind of like the feeling of sneaking with you behind an old wagon of hay…  we stood there waiting for the Event Horizon to happen.  As I adjusted to the darkness I realized we were not along..  someones poodle kept staring at us, so I walked around the hay wagon and underneath I saw a tiger.  By this time I was completely distracted listening to what was saying, how that they would open the conservatory for the Event Horizons so people could come and watch..  Then I saw a momma tiger trying to help her baby tiger up a step.. by a man who was just standing there…

Then my Bear showed up and the next thing I know I crawling up a tunnel and out of a cave …  and fell asleep…

When I woke up I realized things I don’t even realize I realize yet..

In my dreams, I have been compelled to come again and again to this spot…   So many times I have dreamed this journey, this little bitty town with red light at the crosswalk.  I always would pass through the town and head out to the country..  to the winding road with all the trees…  when I would loose consciousness of the dream..

this is the first time I have been able to see that it is a nebula that is calling to me…

I am the Blue Star… and you are the Red Star…  we like to dance that way too..

I am seeing farther than I was seeing since I am consciously running with you…

Orion nebula NASA

Orion nebula NASA

14 ~Prelude to Transcendence, the love story of a Shining Star and his River Song

November 25, 2015 - 4 Responses

Once upon a time, in a land far away, there was a man and a woman whose love was so deep that he formed himself into a Shining Star and she formed herself into a a planet that danced around him while he held her so soft in the length of his arms.  That was but one place where they dwell, for they were Spirit capable of housing themselves within an entire universe at any given moment, but in this place they called home called Andromeda she loved to place her energy in a  planet and dance with her love the Shining Star.  On this planet in Andromeda she could look in the mirror and see her reflection in a beautiful blue and green planet the locals there would call Earth dancing with her love, a shining Star also..  They were the perfect mirror image  for her and her Shining Star lover, her One, her only.

She was a creator, as was he and one of her talents was the fact that she is a River Song.  As a creator she has the power to sing rivers into being with her endless stream of love song that is so pure it creates pure waters to form, so when she accepts a mission it is because the singer of a River Song is being called for.  Not only does she have this power to create Rivers with her never ending love song, but her song also has the strength of song to transmit images back to their Home world.  In the world of spirit there are Rivers or currents that a person on a mission can tap into and send message to their Elder Council and to the Ancients to let them know what is needed to happen next to transform one world into the next..

And it is from this place that the call went out, that volunteers were needed to go to the Earth whose time of ascension had come and they were ready to make the movements back to a lighter dance.  Together our River Song and Shining Star wrote out the contracts for their missions to Earth of what they would do to help purify the living planet…  “Break down the walls of prejudice”, their contracts would read.  “Show honor in the places where none would think it should be given”.  These are the jobs they contracted for always with the intention of arriving at their mission… to sing a song with such purity that in the planet Earths ascension a river whose waters ran pure would be formed…

…  And her One, her love, who plays sacred as a Shining Star, well his love is like thousands of sparkling shining diamond lights dancing on the waters of her song….

Shining Star makes diamond sparkle upon her River Song

Traveling forward in time we find our River Song being born into a blood line she has traveled through before.  Of course the journey through the birth canal was a time of forgetting, of looking out through a babies eyes and trying to find a focus we could land upon, of trying to figure out how to get the body to move, to sit up, to crawl, to walk, to talk.

In these ways we forget our missions, forget what we came for and have to watch for the signs that will lead us back.  That will lead us to the place where we accomplish what we were sent to accomplish..

And thus we find our River Song, living in a human world at the age of 12 staring into the face of flower she found most enchanting..  It was there inside the flower that the vision took place, that a portal opened upon a beautiful Indian woman dressed in white buck skins, her fringe hanging down, honoring the setting Sun.  When she walked rainbows would dance at her feet for her touch was so gentle that they danced to feel her touch.

Rainbows Dancing at her Feet took River Song into her Village and the lessons on how she was to merge with the Earth in all ways began…

Then a second portal opened up and our River Song found herself staring at the edge of a precipice.  It was a huge stone wall in which housed many cave dwellings.. and each one had a door and a window.  As she stared up at one of them she found herself slipping through the doorway, and into a room she recognized by the flower that grew in the window.

River Song could tell that this was her meditation station by the stone bench that sat in the middle of the room.  And as she sat there, in through a beam of sun light slips in a man she recognized as her husbands father, who is a member of the Elder Council.  He is smiling as he steps towards her telling her that the contract she wrote for her mission to the Earth had been accepted by the Elder Council and she had been assigned the bloodline through which by former contract she had agreed to reenter Earths atmosphere through again, this time enhanced by the Warrior blood line the Seer bloodline would merge for the times were going to be tough, getting from point A to point B as a great cloud of darkness had descended upon the hearts of the people who were being lead by fear.

With this another beam of sunlight appears and her husband slips into the back of the room.  With great excitement she finds herself again in the place where he is holding her at arms length.  He is taller than her and he spins her in circles all around his body in sacred dance, his joy at holding her this way is greatly felt by her.

Then he reaches into his robe, pulls out the contract and with great excitement he tells her how the contract he wrote for going to the Earth had been accepted by the Elder Council, and unscrolling the document he shows her the place where their paths have been ordained to join in sacred dance…

With this the portal closes and River Song is back again staring into the face of the flower.  She is 12 years old in the human world and knows she has come to Earth on a mission (her point A)  and knows that she will fulfill her mission when she finds her husband. (Point B) … and all else in the space between are part of the River Song she will be singing in her journey towards a Shining Star setting her horizon… and once she finds him, his light will again sparkle like thousands of diamonds on the love song of a pure River Song Destiny…..








15 ~ NORTH OF THE RIVER dream series

November 25, 2015 - Leave a Response

For the longest time I would have these dreams with you that I would call the “North of the River” series…  and I would call you, “The Indian who walks with me through my dreams”.

These dreams would be marked by the loss of the memory of the dream.  I would have no problem getting to the dream location, but every time it was time for me to leave I would get lost trying to find my way back to my body and would have to drive around  looking for some land mark that was familiar just so that I could get to the road that lead to down town..  Once I would arrive Downtown I would then have to find the ramp that lead up and over, and down so that it would be a Uturn….  when I could come down the U and get onto the highway home, when I would blink, I would not be able to get my eyes to reopen and would then awaken back in my body with barely any memory of the dream other than I had gone and been with my Indian who walks with me through me dreams North of the River..

These dreams disappeared around the time you were preparing to come to Earth as a Walk In…  I did not know why back then that the dreams disappeared, and I would have to travel through some years on a great journey towards reconnecting with you…  and then, well I always had my River Song to call to your heart and the rest is all a part of the sacred dance with you having mastered out of body traveling and I having taken an extensive class on awakening inside my dreams..

This time when you showed up I began making conscious the knowledge that I wanted to see where you were taking me so I looked and looked and looked.. drew the pictures I could of what it looked like until at last I found you inside a dream North of the River…  Gleefully I got out of my vehicle and went to the door and knocked… then there you were standing at the door in your socked feet..  You took me in to the kitchen, to the place that I knew already and into your room that I already knew..

Finally you said, “It is time for you to get back to work..  and I laughed and said, “Will you ever bend your rules to accommodate my fancy free ways?  and you said, so seriously, “No” ….  so I just laughed and said “Ok” for how can one ask a Sun to change course for the planet he holds in such a loving embrace…

Then I asked you if you could look up the instructions for how for me to get to work, as every time I would try to find my way out of this place I would get lost.. and loose the dream..

so you go to your computer, do some typing..  Someone shows up, you walk out of the room and I go look at your computer to see something like  2YO8+3*LO4RU …. AND REALIZED NORTH OF THE RIVER WAS THE PLACE WHERE I HAD BEEN MEETING YOU ALL ALONG… when we came outside and the mated trees.. the mated Eagles..the mated little animals playing on the ground..  and the mated hummingbirds..  I began to see deeper into my trips North of the River

After that, one night you were late in picking me  so I went there by myself… and there were the shops that I already knew…. and the alley that lead to the shops, I had been there so many times before..


swim with 2me












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